Q&As About 'Star Wars': What is your impression of the new Star Wars Episode IX trailer? Do you think it will unite fans?

On Quora, Mike Austin asks a peculiarly worded question.

(I say "peculiarly worded" because it's not quite clear if Mike is asking whether the trailer or the entire movie is the "it" referred to in the question body.)

What is your impression of the new Star Wars Episode IX trailer? Do you think it will unite fans?

My reply:

Oh, for crying out loud…..

First, my impression of the trailer for Star Wars - Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker is pretty much the same as the impressions I’ve had of previous Star Wars films, beginning with the ones on TV for 1977’s Star Wars:

Cool images, yes, but even though they are - by design - a montage of tiny, unconnected moments from a movie no one has seen yet, I have no clue as to what the story’s going to be about.

That’s cool, because I prefer that type of trailer to the tell-almost-everything-about-the-plot trailers that some companies like to use to peddle their wares.

To be honest, I don’t want to know everything about Episode IX before it opens in December, so if the trailer is vague yet intriguing, so much the better.

The other, separate part of this two-questions-in-one post is more aggravating and troublesome, as well as unfounded in reality.

So…are you asking me if I think a trailer will unite fans? Or are you asking me if I think Episode IX will unite fans?

If you’re asking if a mere trailer will unite a divided fandom that probably agrees only that John Williams’ music is the only great element in the entire franchise, but can’t come to agree on anything else, then “No.”

If you’re asking if The Rise of Skywalker will somehow be so great that it will unite hundreds of millions of fans that are, at present, hopelessly divided over such issues as:

• Who’s in charge of Lucasfilm
• The Pros and Cons of the Prequels
• The Pros and Cons of the Original Trilogy
• The Pros and Cons of Return of the Jedi
• The Pros and Cons of the Special Editions of the Original Trilogy
• The Pros and Cons of the Sequel Trilogy
• The Pros and Cons of Rian Johnson
• The Pros and Cons of George Lucas
• The Pros and Cons of Expanded Universe/Legends and Canon Star Wars
• The Pros and Cons of Toxic Fans
• The Pros and Cons of Interpreting Star Wars
• And so on, and so on, and so on, and so on……

Look. I’ve been a Star Wars fan for almost 42 years. I was 14 when the first film was just called Star Wars and was released in theaters with no Episode IV: A New Hope subtitle. And even then, when there was only one movie in existence, there was division among fans.

Some of it was just the usual and expected fan speculation about who (or what) Darth Vader was. Was he all human under that armor? Was he part alien? Would he be rescued by the Empire after the Battle of Yavin? Who was cooler, Han or Luke? Who would end up with Princess Leia; Luke or Han? Will there be more movies, or will we just have to read Marvel Comics for “the further adventures of Star Wars”?

And then, just as now, there was the griping over such things as why was it necessary to have funny droids? Why was Han claiming he could fly the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs? Didn’t that idiot Lucas know that “parsecs” are a measure of distance and not time? Why is there sound in space?

My favorite complaint, one that I’ve never understood, is “Why is Luke Skywalker so whiny?” You know, as in “But I was going to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters!” (This complaint was usually spoken from guys barely out of their own adolescence, who somehow believed that they had never uttered “Oh Mom, do I have to pick up my room now? I was going to go play video games over at Stephen’s house today!”

The point that I’m trying to make is this. Even if Star Wars - Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker breaks all sorts of box office gross records and becomes the first Best Picture winner in franchise history, there will still be fans who will hate it, if for no other reason that “Disney” made it.

(Note: Lucasfilm Ltd. and Bad Robot Productions produced Episode IX. Walt Disney Motion Picture Studios will release it. And yes, there is a difference.)