Unhappy family

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“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”― Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

As 2016 – a year that most of us would like to forget – ends and a New Year waits in the wings, memories of the not-so-distant past continue to haunt me.

Some of them, naturally, are about my mom’s long illness, mental decline and eventual passing. It’s been less than a year and a half since she died, so the emotional wounds haven’t quite begun to turn into scar tissue. The pain, which was intense in the beginning, has dulled a bit over time, yes, but it’s never truly gone.

I suppose that I feel this way in part because I miss my mom. After all, we lived together for more than 50 years, and we had a great parent-child relationship right up to the end of her life. For some reason, she never encouraged me to move out – I have cerebral palsy, and even though I am capable of living semi-independently, Mom felt that it was more mutually beneficial if I stayed at home. She once told me that she didn’t want me to live alone in a tiny Section Eight apartment in a bad Miami neighborhood. She also didn’t want to live under the same roof as my older half-sister, Vicky. (We had tried living with her as an adult three times in the U.S.; each attempt ended in angst-filled turmoil.)

Mostly, though, I have to admit that most of the pain I feel stems from the shabby and downright shady behavior of my half-sister since Mom passed away in July of 2015.

Not only has she forced me to go through a long, complicated estate fight in the Miami-Dade probate court system, but she has:

  • Conspired to sell my mother's house without my consent, believing that Mom's 2001 will was in effect. She already had a Realtor and a buyer lined up. Luckily, Mom made out a 2010 will that nullified the earlier one.
  • Stolen many family heirlooms, including three photos which she was supposed to make copies of, as well as my grandmother's china set. 
  • Asked for (and received) most of Mom's personal effects, while at the same time not showing any concern for my well-being (financial and physical). 


Luckily, she did not prevail at the hearing that she and her attorney had requested, but she got her hands on stuff that she was not entitled to.



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