Fan Commentary: The Worst 'Star Wars' Books I Ever Read? Easy...'The Jedi Prince' Series

Cover art by Drew Struzan. © 1992 Bantam Skylark and Lucasfilm Ltd. (LFL)

If you have ever been a regular reader of non-canon fiction based on a motion picture or television franchise, you've probably noticed that the quality of the writing tends to be uneven. I ought to know; I've been reading novels and other literary works (short stories, comic books, and reference books) set in the Star Trek and Star Wars universes, and I've run across some stinkers in both.

Most of the Star Wars stinkers that I've read are aimed at the general reading audience - ages 12 and up; that is the demographic that most readers belong to, including me. They also were published as part of the old Star Wars Expanded Universe (EU), or what the Lucasfilm Story Group now calls Star Wars Legends, and include stories told in the following formats:

• Novels (The New Rebellion, almost any book written by Kevin J. Anderson, The Crystal Star)
• Comics/Graphic Novels (Dark Empire trilogy)
• Young Adult books 

For me, the very worst Star Wars fiction can be found in the Jedi Prince series of stories for young readers by the husband-and-wife team of Paul Davids and Hollace Davids that was published in the early 1990s by Bantam Skylark. Set a few years after the events of Star Wars - Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, this six-book series starred the heroes of George Lucas's Classic Star Wars Trilogy and pitted them against factions of the late Emperor Palpatine's now-fractured Galactic Empire.

The Rebels (Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia Organa, Han Solo, Chewbacca, Artoo Detoo, and See Threepio) are joined in their fight against the Empire's remnants by a boy named Ken, who happens to be a "Jedi Prince." 

The Imperial Remnant is led by an evil (what other kind is there?) warlord named Trioculous, a three-eyed mutant who claims to be Palpatine's illegitimate son and heir to the Emperor's legacy. He is aided by several Grand Moffs and an assortment of generals and admirals who are eager to recreate the vanquished Empire and destroy the New Republic once and for all.

The six books in the series are:

• The Glove of Darth Vader
• The Lost City of the Jedi
• Zorba the Hutt's Revenge
• Mission from Mount Yoda
• Queen of the Empire
• Prophets of the Dark Side

My issues with the Jedi Prince books aren't that they are written for a younger audience; I think that kids today don't read much as it is, so if writing Star Wars stories aimed specifically at them gets pre-adolescents to grab a book and read, more power to you. 

The caveat to this, of course, is "Just don't write stories in which the Star Wars characters created by George Lucas act in a manner that is woefully inconsistent with their cinematic counterparts." In this series, none of the major characters - whether human or droid - ever comes close to sounding or behaving like their "real" selves. Reading the Jedi Prince series is like reading a transcript of a rejected Star Wars skit for Saturday Night Live. 

Also, Paul and Hollace Davids have two bad habits that would make even younger readers groan with impatience: over the top cheesiness and a heavy-handed way of delivering an environmental message. The biggest offense regarding cheesy writing is the constant mentioning of a fruit called "zoochberry." Ick. I wouldn't have minded that so much had it been mentioned just once or twice in entire series, but references to zoochberries appear, dandelion-like, in every single story. 

As for the ecological messaging: I think it's fine to get kids to think about preserving the environment and saving endangered species from extinction, but the Moby Dick-like subplot about Captain Ahab...er, Captain Dunwell and the Great White Whaladon is (a) too much of a Herman Melville rip-off. plus (b) it is not artfully done. Just...walk away. 

I've read a lot of subpar Star Wars books, but the Jedi Prince books are the worst of the lot. Zero Death Stars, even taking into account that I wasn't the intended audience.